harm.less

With the theatrical release of “A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood,” the world is all about Mr. Rogers right now. So many childhoods were made brighter by his gentle words of wisdom and iconic cardigan collection.

And while we all love Mr. Rogers because he was non-judgmental, relentlessly kind, and perpetually optimistic — the world often seems like it’s going in the opposite direction; more divisive and cynical than ever.

But I would look to his wise words to suggest that maybe things aren’t as bad as they appear. As he said: “The media shows the tiniest percentage of what people do. There are millions and millions of people doing wonderful things all over the world, and they’re generally not the ones being touted in the news.”

In other words, there’s more goodness out there than we realize.

To help us honor Mr. Rogers by being the best versions of ourselves, I put together a list of 10 ways to practice kindness every day — just like he did. 🙏

1. Make kindness your first priority. Being kind should always take priority over being right. (Easier said than done, obviously.) There are lots of times when the last thing you want to do is be kind, particularly when faced with difficult or argumentative people. But they’re often the ones who need kindness the most. Be the bigger person and make a commitment to ABK: always be kind. And even if you have an unkind moment — go easy on yourself. That counts as kindness, too.
2. Meet some of your neighbors. Life is busy, and it’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day and never take time to connect with the people in your immediate proximity. There’s something sad about living side by side with another human being and never getting to know them. So make the effort to speak to one new person in your neighborhood each week. Ask them about themselves, and offer to help if they ever need a hand. The tiniest effort can add a bit of sunshine to someone’s life. Be a good neighbor.
3. Yield to others in traffic. Even the kindest person in the world can have their patience tested in miserable traffic. There’s a reason road rage is a global phenomenon. But this is an amazing opportunity to practice kindness. Instead of fighting to inch ahead, yield to others. Smile and wave. If your trip takes a few minutes longer, so what? Use the time to dance in the driver’s seat to your fave playlist.
4. Give blood. There’s always a need, and it’s an easy, effortless way to give back. You never know whose beloved mom/son/husband/grandma your blood will save. Check out the RedCross.org for drives near you.
5. Eat a plant-based meal. Every time you opt out of eating animal products, you’re extending kindness to your own body, the earth, and — of course — our animal friends. Every choice counts. (FYI Mr. Rogers was an herbivore!)
6. Send a thoughtful card. Sending someone a card is such a small thing, but you’d be amazed at how much it can brighten their day — or potentially even impact their entire life. Put your feelings to paper. Tell someone why they’re so special, share your favorite memory, or write about how they’ve impacted your life in a positive way. That’s the kind of message someone could cherish forever. (Pro tip: Trader Joe’s has an amazing card selection. They’re just $1 each and the imagery and messaging is wayyyyyy better than what you’ll find in a standard supermarket.)
7. Listen. Really listen. Active listening is a special skill. It involves listening intently to someone else, responding appropriately, and offering a supportive and compassionate presence. When many people are just waiting their turn to talk, active listening is a gift. Give that gift to others whenever you can. Everyone wants to be heard.
8. Pick up trash. Litter is an issue almost everywhere, and it always needs picking up. Get yourself a little trash picker (I got mine on Amazon) and keep a few trash bags in your car. When you have a break or pass by some messy spots, take the time to pick up some trash and throw it away. It’s an easy way to practice environmental stewardship — and take pride in your neighborhood, too.
9. Buy someone a coffee. Paying it forward in the Starbucks drive-through line is an amazing gesture (and can sometimes start a chain reaction of kindness!), but even better is to pay it forward while you’re standing on line. Offer to pay for the person behind you, and say hello. A totally unexpected gesture like that is powerful stuff, and you never know what kind of an impact you’ll make. Getting to meet the person you’re treating makes the whole act even more rewarding, and you might even make a new friend.
10. Be kind to yourself. This is probably the hardest item on the list; certainly for me. Often it’s easy to extend kindness to others and a hell of a lot harder to extend it to ourselves. Sit down a make a list of all the ways you’re wonderful. Tack it up by your bed or on your bathroom mirror. In the words of Mr. Rogers: “You are a very special person. There is only one like you in the whole world. There’s never been anyone exactly like you before, and there will never be again. Only you. And people can like you exactly as you are.”

With that, I’ll leave you with two of my favorite quotes from the man himself.

“Try your best to make goodness attractive. That’s one of the toughest assignments you’ll ever be given.”

“The connections we make in the course of a life — maybe that’s what heaven is.”

May we carry Fred Rogers’ message in our hearts, forever and always.

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